Beantown It Is!!

From New Orleans, to Las Vegas, to Idaho, to D.C., to Boston, I think I’ve finally secured a Labor Day weekend destination that only requires a bus ride. This "Labor Day Letdown" (as I coined it today) has been nothing but frustrating and depressing, but spending the holiday weekend with E.L. in MA will definitely be a fun & refreshing time. I'm sure of it.

As much as I would like to be modest and say that the weekend I planted myself upon this world was boring and non-eventful, I just can’t. September 2, 1982 was a fun day for this planet. Alright, now I’m being obnoxious, but you catch my drift!

So you know when you get a package in the mail and it states, “Do Not Open Until a Certain Date!”?? What’s the first thing you do?? Open that bitch up, right?! This happened to me yesterday in the form of a b-day package/envelope from the parental units. And let’s just say an Express giftcard ain’t never hurt nobody, okay!!

So, I'm heading to Beantown. It has a phenomenal energy about it, and I need some of that kind of energy as my biological clock rolls over to the big 2-3! Harvard boys, here I come :-)

Weekend Recap

This past weekend can be recorded as yet another fun and eventful 60-plus-hours-off-from-work in the so-called life of one D.W.M.

Fittingly, the weekend started off with a visit to my home away from home, Verlaine. I met up some of my Sterling peeps to guzzle lychee martinis and talk shit like we seem to do so well. It’s great when you find yourself surrounded by a group of people that you don’t really have all that much in common with, but your love of a good time and a great happy hour are enough to make for a terrific night.

After a fun-filled night of my favorite fruit and some So You Think You Can Dance (which I’m in love with), I woke up reluctantly on Saturday morning and accompanied B.C. to J.K.’s place to breathe life into his UWS digs. And I must say, DAMN. These gay boys have skills!!

After an exhausting day of preparation, it was a quick jet to my place and back to get gorgeous. The party was fun, thanks in part to Miss. Malibu and the other good company I tend to keep.

Click the link below to see more pics of the partay:

share.shutterfly.com/action/welcome?sid=8AZsWTRq5buH2A

It was so good in fact that the cab driver had a difficult time waking me up when arriving at E. 3rd Street! But the best part is I woke up NOT hungover! I worship Miss. Malibu.

Sunday included the most memorable experience I’m afraid. See, there’s a reason I don’t live in Jersey and/or work in Jersey and/or visit Jersey. A gang of gay boys and I were heading across the river after a Kichenette & Century 21 appointment, having no idea what was in store for us. What was in store for us was a $74/person fine for illegally boarding the train without tickets. O-M-G-W-T-F-M-F-F (my exact thoughts.). At least we didn’t go to jail, even though J.S. might have been in favor of releasing some of his "bottomless tension" in a prison cell!! Overall, I would have to say I thoroughly enjoyed my weekend, spending time with great people and making great stories!

Bitch Katrina Update: My family is A-okay. There’s a great deal of wind damage, and no power, but people in other areas have the right to be much more depressed. And it's hard to be pissed that Mother Nature fucked up my Labor Day plans when there are people whose houses are flooded and everything they had is ruined. I still have no clue where I’ll be this coming weekend, but I guess the worst-case scenario isn’t all that bad: I sleep all weekend and forget that I ever had plans at all. Hopefully it won’t come to that.

Until next time, do what feels right and enjoy the pics!

It Seems So Simple, But It's So Complex!

Today was what will be called an emotionally draining day for me, and tomorrow promises to be nothing less than a crazy day full of too much coffee and not enough Gap model hotness.

So I don't have much to share. Just a simple, yet complex, thought. Here it goes...

Unfortunately, there are some questions in life that we will NEVER know the answers to:

Why does it seem that the smartest choices in life are never the easiest ones to make?

How can something so wrong feel so right?

You think on these things, and I'm gonna go crash. I've done way too much thinking today.

Sugar Hangover in Progress

It seems as though I’m always recovering from something, and today it’s a sugar hangover. Thanks to the fabulous Cafe Sabarsky on the UES, I was lying in bed at 2am with my eyes wide open hoping that the paramedics would come and pump my stomach. At 9am this morning at work, I was still twitching uncontrollably. Last night was the worst night’s sleep I’ve had in years, but the indulgence of desserts and great company was well worth my lack of shut-eye. It does help to know that I get off of work today at 4 and can go home a pass the fuck out.

I find it very strange the level to which the binge of sugar effected me. Caffeine/sugar usually makes me very chill and relaxed, but I guess this was a case of too much of a good thing having adverse effects!

Big Easy, Brace Yourself!

It’s been far too long. I’ve decided that 2 years is far too long to be away from my girl, New Orleans. She is one of the greatest cities in this world, and one in which I have accumulated countless memories that I will cherish for a lifetime. From the late-night impulse excursions during my days at the U of M, to the weekend trips of non-stop debauchery with M.D., I HEART THAT CITY almost as much as I heart NYC (and that speaks volumes).

So Labor Day it is. Southern Decadence is an incredibly outrageous celebration of gayness and all the pride that comes with it. If I remember correctly, this will be my 4th time being in N.O. for the weekend…and I CAN’T WAIT.



J.K. and I will be jetting down on Thursday evening after work and flying back on Labor Day afternoon. Also in attendance for the festivities will be the dynamic duo of B.C. & M.S. What also makes the weekend even more special is that Friday (the 2nd) is my 23rd birthday. Not that I’m at all a b-day fan, but being in the Big Easy will definitely help me have an above-average anniversary.

Bourbon and St. Anne, roll out the red carpet. We’ll be there soon!

TOO DANGEROUS TO BLOG

So it’s hump day of week three of the new gig, and until today I had not been properly introduced to the agency via email. M.P., a guy who also holds the title of Office Services Assistant (but in a completely different role), wrote an incredibly witty email of introduction…part of which went like this:

"…please stop by the Bat Cave and introduce yourself to David Miller. David comes to us from the Miami Ad School's Bootcamp for Account Planners, and before that he graduated (Magna Cum Laude mind you) from the University of Mobile, Alabama with a B.S. in Communications. Which explains why he seems rather comfortable in this skin melting weather as of late." Since when is my "office" the Bat Cave and shouldn’t "skin melting" be hyphenated?!

This kid obviously jacked my resume and felt the need to disclose some interesting information that I was intending to keep to myself for a little while longer. But the word is out, I’m working the inside in a major way. And the email already has been a conversation piece between me and the EVP/Executive Creative Director of dotglu, our interactive division. We bonded over a trip to Mobile he recently took to see a close friend of his. I

n tangent news, I’ve been thinking about this blog and what is "fit to print" on it. I have the option to either be completely honest and open, and risk the chance of someone obtaining information that I otherwise would have kept from them…or I can be selective and prejudicial to the thoughts I divulge. Some things are just TOO DANGEROUS TO BLOG. Don’t you agree?

Shifting into Autopilot when you're Shit-Faced

“Please tell me you paid the bartender! I’m still drunk.”…that was my text message to R.S. this morning. I woke up this morning…and I could end the sentence there, because that was a miracle. Somewhere between the 2nd and 8th lychee martini that G. strained into my glass, I became unconscious. And that’s the rest of the story.

But life is good. R.S. and I were able to catch up on our menzes, and G. was wearing his signature white v-neck! And can we talk about how nice it was outside this morning temperature-wise!? But alas, all day I was tired as fuck and I needed my king (bed).

So J.K. and I are contemplating the idea of jetting to Vegas for Labor Day Weekend (instead of N.O.)! Vegas…how exciting! Just the thought of Josh Duhamel waiting in my room makes me hard :-) But, I shall not get my hopes up due to the further financial hardship that I would most likely be taking on and the possibility of me siding with my better judgement and staying on the island for my b-day. Either way, I have major issues with my birthday and most years I have been inclined to skip it. It’s one of those “holidays” that brings to the forefront some of my insecurities , and for some reason I’m not a fan of the 9/2.

But I am a fan of Josh.

That’s all I’m gonna say. Oh, and this…

May the licking commence.

We're Just That Good!

Me with my bestest friend and most favorite person in this fuckin' fabulous world.
(aka M.D.)

Just for the Hell of It

Me, E.L, & T.S.

(My Boston Boys)

You know you totally want to fuck all three of us. Please take a number. :-)

Recovering Alcoholic

Some people just need their sleep. I am one of those people. That’s all there is to it. I strolled into work today at 9:15 wanting more than anything to claw my eyeballs out. Yes, it should have been a glasses day. But the K&B crowd hasn’t yet been graced with the presence of my hot frames, and this body did not feel worthy of them this morning.

On a more disturbing note, David discovered last night that he is currently experiencing serial short-term memory loss. Yesterday it was his keys, yesterday afternoon it was his planner, and last night it was his metro card (not to mention his lunch and chapstick this morning). He doesn’t quite know what to think about this bout of epilepsy that his brain has been experiencing, but I definitely think more sleep wouldn’t hurt!

On a happy note, I was pleasantly surprised yesterday by a small donation that my parents made to my favorite charity, Alcoholics Anonymous (aka my bank account). My pride wanted to reject the donation, but my liver wouldn’t let a silly thing like pride come between me and the man of my life, Vodka And! And it was a legitimate gift for starting my new job. On the card, they cleverly mentioned that the money might be best used for new clothes or my insurance (Cobra) until my new plan kicks in next month. I went out last night instead.

Random "Exactly My Point" Moment of the Week:
Why do people in my office need 4 options of sweeteners for their coffee?! Like we (humans) don’t already have enough decisions to make. Sugar, Sweet-N-Low, Equal or Splenda. What the hell is Splenda? I’m not even sure, but the older crowd loves it. And don’t even get me started about the 4 options of creamers: half & half, skim milk, 1% milk, and whole/vitamin D milk. Now the difference between the 2nd and 3rd choice here is smaller than my girlfriend’s dick. * pause * Exactly my point.

P.S. please excuse my need to place a picture of Miss Malibu on my blog…she is a dear friend of mine! and yes, something is wrong with that picture: the glass is not full :-)

Wishing We Didn’t Care So Much.

One of our fatal flaws as humans is our tendency to care. Although a small percentage of the human race can not relate to that statement due to their lack of a heart or feeling/emotions of any kind, most of us find the care-factor to be a problem.

David, for instance, finds it very important (crucial to his existence) to not like someone more than they like him. Now you never know exactly how (or how much) someone likes you, but we are able to use our sixth sense to feel it out to some degree.

The problem comes in when we "like" with our hearts and not our heads. The Heart is deceitful above all things & Comfort is a bitch. It’s funny how both the lack of it (comfort), as well as the abundance of it, can paralyze you. And yes, I’m out of my mind (or at least heading that way) more often than not…but when my mind is up and running, it can do some killer damage to the world around it (in a good way).

Do I need therapy? Probably so, but I have managed to not down a whole bottle of Ambien yet (or do anything equally as glamorously pathetic)…so the future looks promising! :-)

For now, let’s take a shot in celebration of Hump Day. We’re one day closer to payday and the fabulous weekend that I have yet to plan!

Cheers…gulp…esophagus burn…NICE :-)

Disturbing Moment of the Day:
The new freight elevator guy (an older Latino brotha), when asked if he was hungry for some food I had leftover from a meeting, commenced to divulge that he was hungry for sex. This rhetoric was followed by multiple pelvic thrusts. Not okay, even in New York!

Shitting Where You Eat

In the words of Becky, this clearly closeted lesbianic (and disturbing) creature I encountered last evening at Verlaine, "If you’re getting wasted on a Monday night, something must be wrong."

Actually, Becky, I had a really good day yesterday, following a weekend hostage crisis situation that involved myself, my apartment, and over 60 hours of nothing but "David-Time"! Some would say Pathetic. I say Necessary.

So, I met J.K. at Verlaine after 6 for a little bonding/psychoanalysis. I was pleasantly surprised to find my "favorite bartender in Manhattan" working his hot bod behind the bar. G. is what you call very generous to his regulars, and let’s just say Verlaine has gotten me through some (by some I mean numerous) crazy times!

Here’s the thing: G. totally wants to fuck me! Okay, I’m getting ahead of myself. I totally want to fuck G., and I’m sure he wouldn’t mind it one bit…but what man in his right mind is going to risk losing the opportunity for he and a guest to get totally rocked for $16 (plus a generous tip, of course) just to be able to say, "I fucked my favorite bartender!"???? Not this one, my friend. Not this one! :-)

In its purest form, the old adage of never shitting where you eat is related to fucking (or rather abstaining from fucking) co-workers. But I think it should also be applied to other important arenas of one’s life. So I (should) find it totally irrelevant that I totally want to fuck my favorite bartender, my hairstylist, my optometrist, as well as a sizable handful of the guys I work with @ K&B.

There are some things we are not meant to partake of right now. And some of these things are never meant to come our way/go in our mouths at all. But many of these things make our lives more fulfilled and help us survive ourselves. And for that, I say thanks!

Random link of the day: (dedicated to M.D)
Love Makes You Crazy

I Knew I Liked Kate Hudson (& not just in Almost Famous)

So, I made it through the "first-week-of-a-new-job gauntlet" with minimal scars and a bit of comfort. Although I currently don’t have the most mind-challenging responsibilities, I know that in time the right opportunity will come along. Hopefully, that opportunity will be at K&B; but for now, I’m going to be happy with what I have: a great apartment to myself, a job at a great ad agency, and no great boy to tie me down. Okay, so the latter of those conjures a tad bit of bitterness.

I don’t quite understand why I’m constantly contradicting myself on that front. I don’t want to commit; however, I want some of the benefits that a committed relationship affords.

And it’s not that I am trying to beat the monogamy horse to death, but Kate Hudson agrees that monogamy is unrealistic. In an interview for Access Hollywood, the 26-year-old actress said, "I don't believe (monogamy) is realistic. But, I believe that we, as people, have the power to make it happen."

Power to the people. Where these people are, I’m not quite sure!

I'm a Glorified Coffee-Maker!

In what fucked up world do I get paid more to make coffee for clients and agency partners than I get paid to run and manage a vital role of a company department?! This one, my friend. This one!

The current problem I’m having is (seems to be) that I actually have a desire to do what these mother-fuckers are doing; however, I’m forced to stand on the sidelines and put in my time before moving on to a more glamorous role. I attempted to enter this industry once before through the front door, but I’ve been forced to sneak in through the back instead.

It seems just a tad bit fucked up that there is a whole position (and department) dedicated to making sure that people are adequately equipped to do whatever they want to do at the office when they aren’t actually working. But in advertising, everything can be considered work.

"I’m playing fooseball to release the ideas that have been bombarded and masked by information overload."

"I’m walking around the office visiting all 250 plus people in the agency to get ideas for this project I’ve just undertaken."

Bullshit, bullshit, bullshit. But it’s glamorous, and I feel the need to be as well!

The First Day of the Rest of My Life

So, you might be wondering how my first day of work went today. If you are, it went well! If you aren’t, go fuck yourself because that means you don’t give a shit about me! And that’s okay :-)

My reflective thoughts on the day:

1) I’m definitely going to have to get re-acquainted with the breed of prick that advertising seems to attract.

2) I might have time to write my first novel with all the down time that I expect to have!

3) Can we talk about all the hot gay men I work with?!

4) Today was a good day!

I’m off to enjoy my martini. Cheers.

(Call me when you think it's clever.)