This is Awkward!

It seems like forever since I’ve posted random shit that I’ve come across. Today is the day. First of all, I must say I love me some Radar Magazine.



Their mantra: “Pop * Politics * Scandal * Style”

They even make politics interesting, and I NEVER use interesting and politics in the same sentence! But it’s random pieces like this that keep me going back for more.

Note: Nothing below this sentence came from my brain. I just took the liberty of cutting down the list to the ones that made me LOL. Enjoy :)

You only get one chance to make a first impression. We (Radar) recommend you avoid the following ice breakers:

“This bar used to cool. Now it’s mostly losers.”

“Wouldn’t you just love to die here?”

“Tell me honestly: Do I look like a rapist?”

“Bulimia. Pro or con?”

“May I crack your back?”

“Who do I have to fuck at this party to find out where to take a shit?”

“Ah, yes, my profile pic is from before the accident.”

“What’s your take on the so-called Holocaust?”

“Let’s cut to the chase, shall we? You and me: How much?”

“Do you know the host well, or are you just blackmailing him with photos of his daughter fellating her driving instructor like I am?”

“I think it’s so cool you’re black.”

(Applying hand sanitizer) “Nothing personal.”

(Laughing nervously) “You’re just going to talk to me until someone better comes along.”