Are You Sexually Attracted To Me?

A conversation can never end well when it begins with your boyfriend asking you if you’re sexually attracted to him! This is what I heard this morning right before I found myself breaking up with one of the greatest guys I’ve ever been romantically involved with. Our relationship has been a case of familiarity translating into a lack of passion, at least on my part. I’ve never been able to remain sexually involved with someone I consider a good friend. (and that one time me and some friends were snowed in and invited a random boy over does NOT count)

My only hope is that I haven’t fucked up everything and we can still remain friends. I feel like I can be a much better friend to him than the boyfriend I have been to him.

I’m beginning to understand that the term boyfriend means different things to different people, and that my current understanding of the term is fair at best. All this time I’ve been trying to be a boyfriend without knowing what that term meant to mine. The other day I went looking for a universal meaning.

Boyfriend – n. (boi-friend)
1. a frequent or favorite male companion; beau.
2. a male friend.
3. a male lover.

The above definitions came from Dictionary.com, but the real insight came after gleaming some perspective from UrbanDictionary.com...

1. A male partner in a non-marital romantic relationship usually considered more than an ordinary friend, especially in a romantic sense.
2. Non-essential male counterpart
3. The nice guy you settle for when you realize that the hot bad boys you fall for are just man-whores who make you cry as often as they make you cum.

I know now that exclusivity is not in my current mindset, no matter how bad I wish it were. I’m not sure if I’ll ever be steady boyfriend material, but I definitely realized today that I’m not there yet. I feel somewhere in the middle, like neither completely meaningless or deeply meaningful sex can satisfy me like my DVR and a glass of vino!

So if you’re reading this, and you’re thinking about dating me, RUN AWAY!

On a related note, one that shows where my true passions obviously lie at the moment, I’m once again addicted to Real World. This time the hotties are in Denver and my latest crush is being wasted on Davis, the gay Southern Baptist from Georgia.



Wednesdays at 10pm EST. In the words of Fergie, check it out!